Letting Go.

It’s been a difficult day.

One patient whose wife has terminal lung cancer came to see me today.  I plan on doing a home visit later in the week.  He came for his own medical issues, but we talked about his wife.  He put on a brave face but he is devastated.  Married for 36 years, second marriage for both, this wasn’t supposed to happen to them.

Another patient, in a long-term relationship, just isn’t “feeling” it with her partner anymore.  She hasn’t for a long time, yet remains in the relationship and complains regularly of episodic pain which has been investigated more times than I can count.  Her tests always come back normal.  She left her partner last year for a time, actually started dating someone new but then returned to the long-term relationship.  It would appear that the break really didn’t do much for her.  She still doesn’t know what she wants, yet isn’t ready to take the final steps.

Both of these people have to let go, in different ways.

At some point in all of our lives, we have to let go of something, or someone. Whether it is in death, or simply a parting of ways, it’s not easy.  I struggled to find the words for the gentleman whose wife is dying.

And I just got word another patient has likely entered the final stages of his journey and is now actively dying.

All of this in one day, within a few hours.

I need a drink.

I feel completely overwhelmed with my job today.

I need to let these people go.  I can’t take this home with me.

Husband is coming to pick me up. He won tickets to see an early screening of Godzilla. I need mindless entertainment tonight.  Thank goodness my mom can stay with the kids.