Injured. Am I really a Runner now?

I most definitely have a bad case of Posterior Shin Splints, and now, the Anterior Shin Splints are making themselves known.

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I had an x-ray and ultrasound of both my lower legs earlier in the week and not surprisingly, they tests were normal.  There is no obvious stress fracture, no periosteal reaction, the calf muscles looked pretty good (really good, actually) and there were no obvious tears seen.

Yet, I feel like I’m a mess.

The legs hurt more today than they did two days ago.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that I started riding my bike to and from work.  I need to keep exercising, I need to keep moving.  The bike ride is 20 minutes. About 5-6 km each way. It’s a great way to start the day.

But it’s not the same as running.

I see my physiotherapist on Friday.

I have to wonder how much of this is due to “too much too soon”, worn out shoes, the fact that I am almost 8 months postpartum and still carrying 15 lbs of extra weight.  Could the effects of those pregnancy hormones (to loosen ligaments) be making my legs weaker?

Am I just grasping at straws?

Do I need new shoes?  Do I need stability shoes or shoes with more cushion? Why do they make 500 kinds of shoes? Am I overpronating or supinating?

Why can’t this be easy?

Why can’t I just run without pain?

My girlfriend who runs told me I am likely going to need 6 weeks off running.

SIX WEEKS?????

She said I’m officially a runner now. Being injured is the badge of honor.

Great.

This sucks.

Let’s Talk.

Day 28 – January Daily Blog Posting Month

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Today is Bell Let’s Talk day.  It is a yearly campaign to raise awareness and money for mental health initiatives.  Last year, over $5 million dollars was raised.

I’ve been honest here about my struggles with depression and postpartum depression after the birth of my first child.  It was a very dark time for me, one that should have been a happy time.  For the rest of my life, I will remember my first maternity leave, not because I was ecstatic to have my little girl, but because I struggled daily to get out of bed and be happy she was here.

I got better when I finally admitted there was something wrong.  I went through 16 weeks of intense, weekly Interpersonal Therapy and learned a lot about myself as a mother, as a wife, as a physician, as a woman.

In a lot of ways, experiencing PPD was a good thing; for one, it made me a better family doctor.  It allowed me to empathize with the moms in my practice and to recognize the early signs of depression, especially in the postpartum period.

Mental illness is rampant in our society and the stigma is only slowly being lifted.  I hope that more days like today and stories like mine help ease it just a little bit.

 

It’s Working Folks!

Day 12 – January Daily Blog Posting Month

So, I’m 12 days in to my New Year’s resolution of healthier eating and daily exercising. So far it’s going pretty well.  When I was at the office the other day, I got on the scale and was quite pleased to see that I had lost 5 pounds.  All from just not having dessert after dinner and exercising at home regularly.

I have to say I’m pretty proud of myself.  Cutting out the desserts at nighttime was harder than I thought.  For the first few nights I still felt really hungry after our healthy dinner of fish (or chicken) and vegetables and all I could think about was having a piece of chocolate or some Chicago Mix popcorn.  Those first few days were hard but when I started to notice how my clothes fit every so slightly different, I knew I was on the right track.  My husband tried to stop me from getting on the scale, but I just had to know if the numbers were doing down.  I know it’s going to be a slow, steady decline but I am encouraged by what I’ve already seen happen in the last 10 days or so.

I also noticed that the postpartum telogen effluvium is starting.  Some of the men in the audience may not know this, but women get pretty hairy when they are pregnant.  I had nice layer of fur on my stomach and breasts throughout the pregnancy.  I suddenly noticed in the last week that my belly looked cleaner than it has and that’s when I realized all the pregnancy hair had fallen out.  Yay!  I was happy to see it because it tells me my body is changing; it’s getting back to “normal” and the “svelting” I’m seeing is all part of it.

This week I ran twice.  Now, I said I was going to run three times a week but it was hard to do this week because of the utterly frigid temperatures we had.  I know, excuses, excuses.  My two runs this week were 4.15 km and 3.71 km. The last run was particularly treacherous as I was practically running on ice the entire time.  I’m lucky I didn’t get hurt though my shins were aching by the end and they still hurt a little bit today.

But it’s all good.

I am doing what I set out to do and I don’t feel like I’m sacrificing a lot.  I am not going on a hugely restrictive diet, I am just making smarter choices when it comes to what I eat.  Sure, I have eliminated the nightly desserts and for some that might seem like a sacrifice, but you know what makes it all worthwhile?  When my best friend comes over and we share this:

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